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Eye contact: confident people make eye contact and maintain it in social interactions. Part 2 of Know what you want, and be honest about it.

Women enjoy sex too; she might be fine with some no-strings-attached fun. Some questions to consider: Is it sexual — a checkmark on your bucket list?

Or, are you interested in something long-term, with someone who is more mature than your previous partners? Perhaps you have someone specific in mind already, and are wondering how you can get her to notice you.

If you just want sex with an older woman, for example, your best bet might be dating sites geared specifically toward older women seeking younger men, and vice versa.

There are even cruises devoted to connecting older women with younger men. Again, just be clear about your intentions from the beginning.

Women in and over the age of 40 have lives too; this means that you can meet them literally anywhere — from the gym to a boating club, to an acting class, or even in your local grocery store.

Spaces are shared interest are great for meeting people in general, no matter your age. Forget the stereotype.

As with all people, desires and behaviour differ depending on the individual. Some websites would have you believe that there are specific types of cougar: the moneyed cougar or sugar mama , the angry cougar, the sweet cougar; alpha versus beta cougars.

If you meet a woman at the bar, you might show your interest by smiling at her and seeing if she smiles back.

You could then approach her and ask to buy her a drink. If you are interested in a woman who is in the same running club as you, your tactic would be different.

Be prepared for rejection, and take it gracefully. Many women in their 40s admit to seeking younger men because they are more open-minded, adventurous, and romantic.

When going out on dates , be adventurous and willing to try new things. Share your interests with her, and learn about her interests too.

As with any relationship, take pleasure in learning and growing together. Be honest about who you are. Be reliable and uncomplicated.

Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. If you are seeking a long-term relationship with a mature woman, be realistic about your expectations from her.

If she has already had children and is over the age of 40, it is unlikely that she will want more. Helpful 8 Not Helpful 7. Submit a Tip All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published.

Be prepared for people to judge you. It might not be fair, but if you choose to date an older woman long-term, people will probably judge you.

Helpful Not Helpful Related wikiHows. More References 1. Co-authors: Updated: July 8, Categories: Featured Articles Dating.

Italiano: Riconoscere una "Cougar". Deutsch: Erkennen ob eine Frau ein Cougar ist. Nederlands: Herkennen of een vrouw een cougar is. Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 1,, times.

Did this article help you? Yes No. Cookies make wikiHow better. By continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy. About This Article.

In the s, the Canadian ice hockey team the Vancouver Canucks used the term to refer to the older, single women who attended their hockey games to pursue players sexually.

The Canadian dating site cougardate. Columnist Valerie Gibson leveraged her investigations into cougardate. Since that time, there has been an increasing number of newspaper articles and blogs on the subject.

Such relationships have been seen in television programs such as "Sex and the City" — , "Cougar Town " — , "Lipstick Jungle" — , and "Riverdale" —ongoing , and movies such as "Prime" , "The Rebound" , "Adore" , and "The Boy Next Door" Seductive older women are also featured in pornography—"cougars" is a common subgenre in pornography websites.

Many more cougar-specific dating sites have been launched as well, such as dateacougar. The popular stereotype of a cougar is a heterosexual white or black unmarried woman between the ages of 35 and She maintains a youthful physical appearance, either by exercise, cosmetics, cosmetic surgery, or a combination of these.

She is comparatively wealthy, or at least financially independent, and she expresses her sexuality by publicly pursuing younger men for casual relationships or sexual encounters.

She does so, she says, because she wants a partner who both appreciates and can satisfy a sexually assertive and financially independent woman.

That stereotype also suggests that cougars are commonly looking for fun, temporary sexual liaisons. At the same time, they are perceived as women who strive to correspond to strict, ageist conceptions of female beauty, i.

Sociologist Milaine Alarie compiled statistics for her doctorate thesis on the subject of relationships defined by older women and younger men. She found that overall, and just as in the past, women typically marry men who are slightly older than they are.

In , the U. Census reported that women were older than their husbands by four years or more in only 7. By contrast, men are older than their wives by four years or more in Canadian statistics are similar.

Thus, in both marriages and nonpermanent relationships, the trend is that men are typically older than their female counterparts. Though women are sometimes younger than their partners—entering "cougar" territory—, it is more likely that they will be involved with a younger man in a nonpermanent relationship, rather than a marriage.

Alarie proposes that negative reactions to cougar relationships are so strong because they violate long-standing social norms. For example, there is an assumption in Western culture that men value youth and beauty in a partner, while women value financial stability.

Men are also understood to have stronger sex drives than women and are expected to make the first contact, while women are encouraged to wait passively for men to choose them.

Finally, there's the idea that older women are expected to be asexual. Cougar behavior turns all of these norms on their heads.

In Alarie's qualitative study of 59 women who had participated in cougar relationships, results showed that women had different experiences of social norms depending on their age.

For example, older women were less likely to be affected by the social discourse about cougar relationships, were less preoccupied than younger women were about how long the relationship would last, and were less worried about whether they would miss out on having children or losing their partners as they continued to age.

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If this mature woman has a strong reaction to the small surprise you arranged, then you can try to get in touch with each other on the next date.

At the same time, the anticipated arrangement can also help you to screen the preferences of mature women to avoid wasting time, energy, and money.

If at the stage of anticipatory arrangements , mature women clearly express their dislikes and dislikes, then it is better to change to a surprise that is in line with women's aesthetics or the dating location.

Learn to approach each other slowly to draw closer to the relationship. The proximity here refers not only to physical contact but also to approach in multiple aspects of language, mind, and body.

In language, you may need to learn to express your emotions well. For example, "Your clothes match well today" "I feel warm with you around" and so on.

You have to know that mature women are very cautious about their language because they consider too many factors. At this time, your straightforward expression will make them feel different warmth.

A further approach is a psychological or emotional approach. Before this session starts, you need to get along and understand for a while.

In the process of getting closer to each other, you can talk more about common topics and hobbies, such as outdoor sports, movies or food, and other relaxing topics.

Explore a state of harmony between the two parties in a common topic. Whether it's hobbies or ideas about something, these can all become topics that you get psychological resonance.

After the hookup dating partners resonate, your psychological distance will be further shortened. The last link is the closeness of the limbs.

This link in hookup dating is the link most likely to cause problems. Because some men are very noisy to control their desires and strong emotions, they can't wait to make physical contact when mature women have not fully accepted themselves.

No matter how good your realization is in front of you, as long as you show impatient behavior, then all the foreshadowing in front will be destroyed.

So remember, before making physical contact, you need to make sure that mature women have accepted you psychologically.

At this time, you can try to hold her hand in the movie theater and look affectionately into her eyes, or you can gently hug the other person and enjoy the quiet atmosphere.

She does so, she says, because she wants a partner who both appreciates and can satisfy a sexually assertive and financially independent woman.

That stereotype also suggests that cougars are commonly looking for fun, temporary sexual liaisons. At the same time, they are perceived as women who strive to correspond to strict, ageist conceptions of female beauty, i.

Sociologist Milaine Alarie compiled statistics for her doctorate thesis on the subject of relationships defined by older women and younger men.

She found that overall, and just as in the past, women typically marry men who are slightly older than they are.

In , the U. Census reported that women were older than their husbands by four years or more in only 7. By contrast, men are older than their wives by four years or more in Canadian statistics are similar.

Thus, in both marriages and nonpermanent relationships, the trend is that men are typically older than their female counterparts.

Though women are sometimes younger than their partners—entering "cougar" territory—, it is more likely that they will be involved with a younger man in a nonpermanent relationship, rather than a marriage.

Alarie proposes that negative reactions to cougar relationships are so strong because they violate long-standing social norms. For example, there is an assumption in Western culture that men value youth and beauty in a partner, while women value financial stability.

Men are also understood to have stronger sex drives than women and are expected to make the first contact, while women are encouraged to wait passively for men to choose them.

Finally, there's the idea that older women are expected to be asexual. Cougar behavior turns all of these norms on their heads.

In Alarie's qualitative study of 59 women who had participated in cougar relationships, results showed that women had different experiences of social norms depending on their age.

For example, older women were less likely to be affected by the social discourse about cougar relationships, were less preoccupied than younger women were about how long the relationship would last, and were less worried about whether they would miss out on having children or losing their partners as they continued to age.

The meaning of the term "cougar" seems to vary with the speaker.

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